okay so we all know teddy’s a hufflepuff like his mom but he’s not like, a hufflepuff hufflepuff. you know what i mean. we all headcanon hufflepuffs like “soft sweet food baby!!!” and most of them are. ernie macmillan, hannah abbott, even professor sprout. soft sweet food babies, like plants and sunshine, whatever.
but teddy lupin’s not like that. because teddy’s a cedric diggory hufflepuff. we all talk about how he’d set records for pranks like the marauders or fred & george, but let’s think about it- he wouldn’t even have to. he’s dating a hot eighth-veela ravenclaw, he’s head boy, and his godfather is harry chosen one potter, so we know he already thinks he’s a badass. and the other hufflepuffs would see it too- look at this awesome guy with the power to change his appearance at will, look at him dating the most beautiful girl in school (and also probably the smartest and most punk, i mean come on she came from fleur charmed a dragon delacour and bill i’m never cutting my hair weasley), look at him tell embarrassing stories about the guy who killed the dark lord, he’s amazing, and he’s a bloody hufflepuff. they would flock to him. he wouldn’t be this punk, angsty, my parents died orphan kid, because molly weasley would never let him feel like an orphan, and harry’s been there and would make sure the kid had a good upbringing, and andromeda tonks raised nymphadora tonks so she’s already dealt with the punky teenager and you just KNOW teddy would one-up his mom and set new records for rebelling but not getting caught.
so teddy’s a cedric diggory hufflepuff. he’s gonna care fiercely about his friends and work harder than anyone else and make it all look effortless. he’s gonna get the girl he wants and he’s gonna be himself to do it, because, honestly, who’s cooler? he’s gonna feign modesty when needed and inspire envy and crushes in lesser boys. teddy lupin isn’t a sunshine-and-food hufflepuff, and he’s not some angsty-punk-slytherpuff-hybrid, either. he’s the son of the brains of the marauders (we all know Lupin’s the reason they didn’t get expelled). he’s the son of the girl who flaunted bubblegum pink hair while fighting death eaters. teddy lupin’s a cedric diggory hufflepuff.
I’m playing a lawful good dragonborn paladin of Dol Arrah
The party is involved in a conflict between orcs and goblins because our wizard is a dumbass and escalated the conflict we were supposed to stop. We’re also on a mission from Dol Arrah to kill a tannaruk, an orc/demon hybrid that Gruumsh really really hates. As the battle is about to start, the GM describes the scene. The two armies about to go to war, the scarred plain between them, the massive figures of the gods themselves looming over them visible only to the divine casters of the party.
That last bit was a mistake.
I turn towards the figure of Gruumsh and yell “Hey Gruumsh! You’re a god, I’m a paladin, we have a common enemy, can I get some smite?“
The GM sighs. “Make a religion roll,” he says, knowing I have never rolled above a 10 on religion before.
Nat 20. I get an extra d8 on all my attacks against this thing.
Few months pass. We end up running into my evil former mentor. He’s a lot stronger than us, we’ve already been fighting and we’re not at full, things aren’t looking good.
My evil former mentor happens to be a high elf.
“Hey Gruumsh!” I yell. “Wanna help me kill an elf?"
write write write 