yourplayersaidwhat:

Context: It was the first time playing for a lot of the players in our group, so very strange things happened constantly. Most notably, our Warlock started carrying a stool around everywhere, even into dungeons. Later into the session, everyone but the Bard managed to get arrested by the townsfolk we were supposed to be helping, and the Warlock tried to plead his case during their trial.

Warlock: The stool made me do it.

NPC: It… what?

Warlock: The stool. It’s haunted, and it possessed me, that’s why I’ve been carrying it around everywhere. It’s an eeeeevil stool.

NPC: Wh- This stool!? You know what, I’ll just take this and- *bashes the stool against the wall.*

The strangest part is, he was still one of the least problematic players present.