meta meme
Oh man, neither. I mean, it’s different in the movies (because of that whole ‘Nice one, James!’ thing), but strictly going off of the books…I really don’t think it’s either. I think knows exactly who Harry is. And that’s half the problem.
Harry, to Sirius, has a few different identities:
When he (Ron, and Hermione) disarm Snape–a professor with a grudge–rather violently so Sirius and Remus can explain, he’s Lily and James’ kid.
When he spares Peter’s life and saves Sirius later that night, he’s James’ kid.
When Harry worries about Sirius’ safety (something Sirius doesn’t worry about, because he doesn’t see himself as something worth protecting), he’s Lily’s kid.
When Harry wants to be let into the Order, he’s Prongs’ kid.
And when Sirius leaves Grimmauld Place to go protect him, he’s Sirius’ godson.
Sirius was never afforded the opportunity to grow up. Hell, he was never given an opportunity to even defend himself. He’s so confused and emotional, because he’s still a twenty-one year old kid, but now he’s saddled with responsibility and has no idea which way is up.
The last time he’d seen Harry, he was this little thing bundled up in a blanket, being kept away from him. He couldn’t do much as hold him, and sure as hell didn’t get a chance to say goodbye. Sirius’ entire reason for living, for fighting, for waking up in the morning, is Harry.
But he doesn’t know who Harry is.
The best he can do is try to piece together the things he does know (the memories of Lily, James, the tiny little thing that holds his finger so tightly he fears he might actually die from happiness, and how Remus interacts with him) and hope for the best.
Unfortunately, these are memories of other people from another time. Harry is none of these people, and no matter how hard he tries, Sirius can’t help but become frustrated. He knows he can’t expect the same from Harry as he did James, because he and Harry aren’t the same age and making the same mistakes at the same time.
He knows he needs to be a good influence and guide him, but he’s so full of total despair he can barely remember to eat most days. It’s been so long since he’s actually felt anything normal, and the only time he does feel is when he’s fighting (with a wand or his tongue), terrified, or desperately sad.
That, combined with how he remembers his own youth (and how invincible he believed James and himself to be)…
I think, in his own way, Sirius knows who Harry is. It’s just fragmented and confusing to him, and it becomes way too frustrating.
Honestly, his own pride and reluctance to ask for help does not help the situation in any way. Someone please give this man a hug.
@snufflesmajor 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
…..well there goes my heart
Do you think Sirius genuinely confuses Harry for James, or is it more of a ‘I’m old and mixed up the names’? What are your #deep thoughts?
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